We are putting our house up for sale!

Crazy I know! We've been in our house like 14 months but we want bigger & more land...I'm putting sign in our yard tomorrow evening! Wish us luck!

Decisions decisions

Ok I've made a decision...we are taking a break from trying. I'm gonna focus on loosing some weight. I know I need to its just really hard bc I love to eat:)!!! I've kinda set a little goal that everyday me & A are gonna go on a scavenger hunt around the neighborhood( me walking and Alyssa riding her bike). I'll also just make better choices with food. This is something that needs to be done! I probably won't ever be "thin" but I could get healthier & loose this baby weight already (A will be 4!!!! Next month) anyways that's all I've got right now. Ohh my Dh is about to go work in Kansas for like 3 weeks :) but good money :)

Vegas!!

So we just got back from our first Vegas trip which was booked two days before we left! Fun!!! We really enjoyed ourselves! We def didn't cover everything. We got there Friday and checked in and ate at the prime rib loft...yummy! Then headed out to our first show- crisscross angel "Believe". It was pretty good. Saturday we walked all over Vegas. There is just so much to see! Tons of shopping and food and our favorite... PEOPLE WATCHING!We ate at the casino buffet that afternoon... Umm I had anything from a lil habatchi to Italian to ribs..lol we wasted so much food but wanted a taste of everything! We then headed to our 2nd show..blue man group. We really enjoyed that one! Sunday we were busy!! Trying to soak up the last day there. We did the csi experience which was pretty cool! We ate at Grotto for dinner. Where we sat we had a clear view of the shark tank/swimming pool...which was too cool. We visited freemont street after dinner which was an experience! I could go back! The whole point for this getaway was to be able to enjoy one another and that we did. We held hands as we strolled through Las Vegas. It was nice. Now to planning a trip to enjoy with our sweet girl!

I'm craving a nice romantic getaway with my man!

Not too much o post on. My clomid didnt mistreat me A's bad as I thought! My only complaint was I would get super over heated!! But no headaches and can't remember any mood swings:). This is the week I'll be ovulating so prayers my way please!!!!! My goal in the near future is to get the extra bedroom turned into a nursery! So wheni do get pregnant I can really enjoy it. And plus it will be fun for A to pretend in there. She can put her baby in the bed and such. Ok so this is the time of year that my business BOOMS! It's easy for me to do at least 20 brazilians a week or more. Some days Ive done like 12-15 in one day...everyone is going on vacation....everyone! So I'm getting the fever:). I believe we are going to cancun to an adult only all inclusive place. This will take the place of our 5 year anniversary in December. I'm really excited!!

Clomid

Ok so here goes my 4th round of clomid but switching it to 100 mg instead of 50mg...and some other type of medicine...yikes! Hope I don't get too crazy,hot,headachy....my dh is fully aware of the possible side effects so we are good..I am debating if I want to do another iui right now. It just seems like so much money...just at the womans clinic in 3 days I spent $485. The chances don't increases that much with an iui so I'm just not sure. I'm sure when the time comes I'll do it. Bc money really isn't what's holding me back (not that we are rolling in the dough) but realistically a couple hundred here & there is a lot less than adoption. Which is what we will be seriously facing come fall. But for some reason I'm pretty confident in this next cycle.... My dh has been out of town for a week now...I miss him like crazy. He's heading home today so I will see him sometime in the morning. I filled my days up quickly...playdates, pokeno, recital,ball....loved every minute. Last night I got to watch my friends 2 sweet girls while they got one last date night before welcoming their baby boy. Oh how their world is about to change with a new baby. The baby's mom is a super mom...we joke about where she hides her cape haha...so it probably won't face her :). So A had her fist dance recital and did amazing....everyone told me she did great. She enjoyed herself you could tell. She said last night that she wanted to do it again...we will see she is so quick to change her mind. I would love her to though. I have been looking up vacations lately...we want to go on a romantic getaway. But just a 4 day one( we are so busy with work). I'm thinking maybe Mexico??

My monthly not so best friend

Well so I've been keeping busy the past two weeks playing the waiting game... Which really wasn't that bad. I've been reading blogs... Like 5 years of one persons life... And so this is THE week and I started...today at chickfila...on a play date. Blah! But you know what... I really just have to look at what I do have. I have a precious baby girl and the best husband. My Dh is pretty bumbed too... But I've been hearing a lot from mainly one person saying I'm not praying with faith... So I'm just gonna start praying for not necessarily to get pregnant, but for God to lead me in the direction I should be in. Whether it be to just keep trying or adoption. Maybe he has a baby being created for us??? Or just maybe he thinks that our sweet girl is all we need. I'm getting tired of talking about it like I'm that girl that always has something... U know those types huh? Well the other night at heart to home one of my heart moms made a little announcement about how they had prayed over one of my heart sisters a few months back & there she sat 12 weeks pregnant.(I was thrilled when she told me!!!) She also went on to mention things about how hard it can be to get pregnant & truly how it's simply a miracle! Well I literally was about to loose it. Then we prayed & she mentioned my name... Omg my throat closed up and nose started pouring... I was on the verge of crying out loud. Like the boo hooing you would do in your room gasping for air. Well after prayer I went straight to bathroom and wanted so bad to sit down and let it out. But I couldn't. I didn't want to cause I big fuss!!! I just splashed water on my face and walked out. I'm sure u could tell I had cried but glad no one asked bc I was trying to keep that smile on my face. Bc I knew my period was about to start and it really really sucked! Well here goes to doing round 4 of clomid @ 100 mg... Crazy lady in the house!!

IUI #1

Yesterday was a hectic day. I got my very first positive on my ovulation teat. Thanks to my new dr that told me to start testing my urine my first urine after around midnight. See sometimes I can pee a few times be4 I would ever take my test and she was thinking that was maybe what was wrong. Well I called her office first thing. I never heard back so I called then they called me. She said we could do it that evening or this morning. Well I was booked at work so evening time was best for we. My dh was very confusing...I can't wait til I never have to get a sperm sample from him again. It's become business and that stinks! Well they told me to go to one clinic and they can't even clean the sperm or whatever they do there. So they sent me to another one and had me put the sample in-between my boobs...so they wouldn't die. Got to the other clinic and the lady said they looked good. I was kinda nervous at that point just from running around. Well the front desk people were saying something about has that girl not came yet. Then I heard a yes she's right there...the windows open...meaning shut up she can hear you. Well when they called me back I was on the verge of crying. I did start crying and they were really nice to me. I told them what had happened and they said they'll take care of it so it doesn't happen again. Well when my dr got there she was very Sorry for the mess up.. She informed me she's getting a new nurse Monday and hopefully her staff will be better. I like that she realizes the nurses are important. They can make you feel comfortable and good, or like they are not interested and in a hurry. I need to be treated like I'm their only concern. I know I'm silly. Well the actual insemination was a little painful. And after I kinda had a light cramp feeling until late last night. She told me to try and have intercourse if possible last night and this morning... Needless to say I was so sick that that didn't happen. I ended up not working today...I hope I get better I'm so busy at work. Im probably double booked but oh well...I'm staying in bed all day. My dh became mr mom last night. I was out od it. He fed, bathed, tucked A in bed. Then he woke up got her ready and brought her to school. This 2 week wait is gonna be fun but also I'm so anxious to find out. A's even praying for a baby sister AND baby brother lol....6 months ago she hated the idea of it. When it happens it's gonna be just perfect :)

Omg!!! I just got a smiley face at 4 am

Ok so we discussed how often I pee in the early morning until I finally wake up and test my urin. She told me to try & start testing after midnight. Yea so if I wake up at 1 am... Go pee on the stick. Do You know how long the results take when your halfway asleep??? Like 10 minutes that a long seems like 30 minutes! Well guess who woke up at 4:15 am and got a BIG smiley face... This girl did! You would think I just found out I was preggo!!! I took pics of it and everything. I'm such a nut. I do crack myself up often. Im not sure I can even go to sleep now! I'm calling the office as soon as the open to see when we can come in. I'm just so happy that I am ovulating on my own. I thought I was but wasn't sure since I have never got a positive on my stick. Well of course I'm about to google if it's ok to be sick and do iui.. Yes I woke up at 4 with a very sore throat & I'm snotty. So hope that doesn't affect anything. I'll keep y'all posted. Prayers my way!!!! Thanks

Doctor appointment

Ok so after leaving the doctors office this time I felt like I should of been feeling!! I love Dr. Salas...this is what I've wanted out of a doctor. I really can't explain it but it was just so nice. She we are just gonna start on an aggressive plan. If I ovulate this week we will do an iui (artificial insemination). If I start my period I will start clomid again but she doubled my dosage to 100 mg. Wow kinda nervous about those side effects. It will be ok though. Then I'll follow that with an iui. Then if that doesn't work I'll then do 150 mg of clomid... Yikes! Then after that she said we will do more blood work then visit the injectable world..double yikes!! I am such a baby when it comes to needles :). But I sure do want a little baby more... Have I mentioned how much I love my new doctor!!!

New doctor

Ok guys the day has finally arrived!! After having a nightmare this weekend about missing my appointment...what?!? Crazy right. As I began to panic I realized... It was only Saturday & I needed to quit being crazy! Well my plans for this visit is to get pregnant like yesterday:). For real though.. I should be ovulating any day & would love to do the iui this month. I'm probably jumping the gun but I demand to be put on the aggressive plan. There's no more it will happen when it's suppost to happen. That was easy to take year 1 but as the 2 year mark of ttc is approaching I can't help but be so over this! Gotta go just got called back :)

"recovery" week 4 p90x

Recovery my butt!!! I hate hate hate yoga or at least p90x yoga. My dh has been working on our sidewalk..it's looking pretty fab! He is very talented. Lucky!! I know I am:) Well I don't have much to report on. I go to the same church as my new dr that I will see on Monday. Well I actually went up to her Sunday and introduced myself to her. And yes I'm gonna love her! Work has been very busy this week..me & my sister have been to two different schools this week waxing teachers for appreciation week. They deserve it!! Well everyones bathed and the voice is on... Gotta spend some time with my man

Easter

This past weekend has been so very busy. A had a blast at her Easter party.


We went to see the easter bunny and while we were there we took glamour shots...she was deathly afraid of the easter bunny, but did good for the pictures after we saw him. Heres some of my favs

I'm back!

Well we finished week 2 of p90x... With my schedule getting busier all our free time we are using working out. A started ball this past Friday night. I was one proud mamma. Yesterday we went to lowes...we got a ton of pavers for our walk way and to outline our flowerbed. I think we got like 230... Oh my I felt the burn while loading and unloading. After that we heading over to a surprise party. Can we say fun! There was a jumper for kids, fishing, and chatting with the girls. I got to love on some of the babies too. I almost forgot A has been sleeping in her bed without her tv! She got it taken away a week ago...she has def surprised me. Well it's been pretty nice to be on a baby break. Not that we aren't doing the things to create one but im not counting and such. My doctors appt is on the 30th. I'm pumped...I'm just focused on trying to eat better and working out. And no we aren't killing ourself...we still eat foods we crave but we mainly keep it on the weekend. We don't go get ice-cream or anything but we do eat more than ckn & fish. Our goal is to eat at home making healthier things during the week. Which saves tons of mula! My dh worked on our backyard all last wknd. We are getting ready to start the deck..wahoo!!I'm pumped. Every morning before school me and A go check to see what flowers have bloomed. We are just loving it! We got 2 rocking chairs Friday and it's so nice rocking on the front porch...

My body hurts

We have concured day 2 of p90x.... Yay!!! I'm super excited about my decision to switch doctors. Yesterday at MOPS I overheard some girls talking about my new dr and I was oh so excited!!!I'm too worn out to write lol...sad huh! Oh well I'll keep ya posted

Day 1

Ok so we completed day 1 of p90x. If you would have been a little fly on the wall you would have pee'd your pants:) it was tough, but we did all of it. I think it was like an hour and a half...now we are relaxing ahh...I hope we aren't too sore tomorrow. I made a chicken and broccoli stir fry and had a little side salad for dinner. Getting use to not eating a snack after dinner is going to be hard... I love to eat!!! This 1 1/2 hours me and my dh will be spending together are gonna be priceless.. Really...we already came up with a high five thingy after we complete the workout lol!!

Saturdays

It's been a pretty good weekend. I love being off on Saturday's. I would never work a Saturday again if it wasn't for my clients. Well my dh had to work so me and A went to cracker barrel for breakfast. Yum! Then we went to walmart, and then went to go see my dh and talk to him while he worked. We then came home to nap and get my food ready for the pinterest party. The party was fun. I had high hopes of doing a certain craft but I bought the wrong thing. Oh well I enjoyed myself. My medicine is giving me hot flashes! My headaches aren't as bad as the other times. Thank goodness. I purchased the most expensive ovulation kit and I started testing today. Of course I messed up and had to use another one. All I can think about is Monday!!! We start p90x... I pray we can stick with it. It's gonna be hard but A's long as we both stay committed we will do it. My dh told me I need to quit planning stuff...lol the past 2 months have been so busy! We are hardly ever home, and we love being at home. We are going to a crawfish boil tomorrow evening. I'm so excited! I'm hoping that I can focus on getting healthier and not so much on getting pregnant! By the way....I get sick of hearing.....your just trying too hard....or just relax....Really?? I only wish I didn't have to test to see when I'm ovulating or I so wish I could take it or leave it when it comes to more kids....I want atleast 3 babies! No one truly can understand until it's happened to them. I can't even imagine those friends of mine that long for just ONE baby. My heart hurts for them. I pray God has a reason for all of this

P90x

Omg...I'm getting nervous! Me and my dh start p90x on Monday. We are up late watching an infomercial on it. Im just so nervous bc its such a commentment. 7 days a week! We got the DVD set from my bro-in-law. We both have gained a ton since we met. And we are ready to get healthy. I'm losing weight for me and my family. My dr said my weight doesn't have Anything to do with me not getting pregnant but maybe this will help. Hold me accountable please. I really need this. I really need to loose 70 lbs or so. We can do it. Just have to PRAY!!

Family vacation

We had a wonderful little vacation. A is really getting to be a big girl. Well I started on my clomid Monday night and the headaches are coming...yuck. Well I will not be doing the insemination this month..or I don't think I am. My appt with the new dr isn't until April 30th. I'm scared that if I go in for my iui with my current dr he will know I'm switching.... I'm probably just crazy:). Well the one good thing that's come of this long wait of getting pregnant is that A is all about being a big sister now. Last week she told a friend of mine who's a teacher at her school that I was having a baby this week... And she keeps asking me about the baby. I'm loving it bc when I really do get pregnant she's really gonna understand and be excited!! Well my dh is coaching A's wee ball team friday. How exciting! Ohh and Saturday is the day I've been waiting for!!! The PINTEREST party!! With all my sweet friends. I'm so ready!

I've been slacking!

Ok so I think I'm finally about to start this long awaited period. Ugh... Why does my body have to do this? Well I actually switched doctors today. If I do get a positive on my ovulation kit then I'll do my iui with my current doctor. I won't see new dr until April 30th. I'm very nervous. Not sure why not like my dr will notice I'm gone?!? Well my little family is going on a weekend getaway. The thought of adopting is getting more real. I'm setting a goal for July. If I'm not pregnant by July then we will look into adoption. Prayers my way :)

The weekend

Oh what a fabulous weekend. My sh went on a camping/fishing trip with the guys in our life group. While the guys were out the girls & 15 kids got together for pizza & fun. Saturday A had her first wee ball practice. She did great. She was maybe the best on the team! Really...she minded the whole time and loved playing. Ahh she makes me one proud mama. This evening we had a play date at the park. It was just beautiful. So my AF is a week and a half late. I think it's coming though. I'm ready to start my meds and then do the iui. I'm very nervous on the other hand. This is another huge step in our journey. I hope I get a clear positive with my ovulation kit this go round. I'm gonna buy a kit that clearly states if I am or not. I'm gonna be welcoming two sweet boys into this wonderful world this week. We are taking a little family vaycay this coming weekend.

BFN!

Ok so I went and bought one of the most expensive pregnancy tests... Prayed the whole way back to work and then I see the " not pregnant"...my heart sunk:( I am loosing hope. Like I am not sure if I can continue much longer down this journey. It's mentally draining. Well tonight my life group is going to the pastors house for food and fellowship. That will probably make me feel better.

Still nothing

Still no sight of AF. I will be buying a pregnancy test tomorrow at some point :)pray for a positive!!!

No news

Ugh I'm getting tired of this game my body is playing! Still no sigh of AF. I've taken 2 dollar store tests (both neg).I'm setting a goal..if Thursday comes I'll take a more expensive one. I just get so nervous!

Munchkin market

I am so tired! I worked 8 straight hours at munchkin market. It's an upscale consignment sale of kids clothing. This is my THING!! I love it so much. Well if anyones seen my AF please let me know, bc I was sup post to start last Thursday. There's no sign of it. I've taken 2 pregnancy tests... Both were a BFN. What!?!? Ugh so now I'm just waiting. I'm gonna do some DAMAGE at mmarket when I do get pregnant with my next bundle of joy. I have no feelings that I'm pregnant, but when I found out I was pregnant with A I had no clue! Like never would have guess I would be pregnant. Well this evening A's coach came over to meet us. My sh is gonna assist him. I'm gonna be the team mom along with his wife. We are too excited!!! We are switching A's bed into a full bed Tom. A friend of mine sold us a very good matress set. She acts excited. Well I'm worn out. I'll keep you updated about my situation (if AF is visiting or a precious baby). If only we could be so blessed :)

Outside

Oh my goodness...today was by far the best day we've had in the longest time. In fact this weekend has been simply amazing! We slept in..went to brunch at cracker barrel...went to get A's wee ball stuff...went to academy and ended up buying a trampoline on our way out(what a fun surprise!)...put trampoline together & got munchkin market stuff together( while A got some beauty sleep)...jumped after nap...went to eat a early dinner...hit up lowes so my sh can do our walkway in the front...came home and stayed outside until 9ish...I LOVED every minute of the day. Looks like we will be starting on our deck in the back yard after my new nephew arrives. I cant wait!! I look forward to having many days/nights out there eating..reading..visiting..well so either I'm preggo or Gods letting me enjoy my weekend. I did take a test yesterday and got a big ole negative. Boo! My time will come eventually.

Parents night out!

I can not explain what a good time we had tonight. I'm loving getting to know all these wonderful couples. We went to Tokyo and then orange leaf! We were all stuffed! Well I was suppost to start yesterday...I cramped last night pretty bad, but today nothing. I pray almost every time I go to pee(which is ALL the time) bc that's when I know..anyways tmi huh..well tomorrow I'm OFF!! I'm very excited. Gotta get stuff ready for munchkin market. I look forward to this thing that happens twice a year. It makes me really happy.

Cramps :(

So this evening I started having light cramps. I keep praying that I don't see RED. It's now 9ish at night and I'm cramping more. It hurts, but I'm a big baby...well tomorrow me and A are sleeping in a little. I don't have to be at work until 10 and I'm excited. This will be her 2nd time to check in this week and she didn't even go Monday! Oh well not like she's in REAL school, even though they do give early morning detention...even to prek 3! Today was a pretty good day. Me and mom went and looked at fabric for the cushions for my breakfast nook my neighbor is making us. All that's left is to be painted. I am so excited. I TRIED cooking bacon deer burgers one of my clients gave me this week. They kept falling apart. My sh came in and asked what kind of meat it was. Because it was very moist. Lol I keep it entertainig around here for sure. A starts wee ball next week. We are very excited. I'm sure many future posts will be filled with funny wee ball activities.

Doctor appointment

Today was the doctor appt day. I didn't talk much, because when I would I got that being choked feeling....like I couldn't really talk full sentences kinda feeling. I hate that feeling. My doctor is just as positive as ever. Not sure if he is reminding me of my age over & over again or just asking me every time bc he can't remember. He said today that he thinks I'll get pregnant ...he's not worried about it. Now if I was 34-40 yes he would be more concerned. He said natural or with medicine I will get pregnant. I then told him...I honestly don't think I can try much longer (chocking up). I kept thinking if you cry your bill is gonna be expensive!! I was sweating and scatterbrained.. Me and my sh made a deal or he asked me to make this deal with him..after I get pregnant we won't try like this again. Meaning if the 3rd or 4th or 5th(probably just kidding with that many) just happens we will count it as a blessing. Neither one of us want to go through this again. It's so hard. We are doing everything right...we are married, have a loving house, pretty much debt free(house), Christians (I need prayer:)). So anyways my doctor prescribed me clomid still the low dosage. He doesn't think I need any higher plus the side effects are worse. And I will be doing an iui when I ovulate next. I'm not filling my medicine until I start, bc I still have hope I may be pregnant. I will know anytime now. I am scared to death. We have parents night out this Friday and we are going to eat with our life group friends. I'm also off this weekend too...I just hope my weekend doesn't get ruined. It's not like im just going to stay in bed crying. No me & my sweet girl are sleeping in, going for breakfast, going to the park...hopefully do some artwork...so yes we will be busy bees. I'm really lucky that I have certain people in my life now that I can request prayer from, And that genuinely care. I have tons of friends and they all play different roles. I am very blessed. This month i get a new nephew and a sweet friend of mines having her little boy. I'm very excited but at the same time know I'm gonna be I'll say it a little jealous. I know it's not right to be that way but it's the truth. I loved being pregnant and I loved being in labor all day. I loved having people hang out all day waiting for the arrival of my baby. My girl is asking more about the baby we've been talking about. Alyssa-Is it a boy or girl mommy? Me- we don't know yet... Alyssa- is the baby in heaven with God? REALLY? I love that kid. Ohh I've got to share this. Tonight when we were walking into church Alyssa had her 2 quarters. I told her she needs give them to the church. She said to God? Me- yes to God. She then looked down her shirt and said if I do the quarters will fall on the ground. I asked why and she said because God is in my heart. That moment just made me so happy. She really does listen when we talk to her.

Mondays

Mondays are my free days...like do whatever I want day. This Monday I chose to keep my girl out of school. We went to mops at church, then went and got chickfila. Took a good nap (we always take them together). When we woke up we brought the food to my friend. Then we went to the wellness center with my friend and my husband came shortly after. We did a pretty tough class then soaked in hot tub ahh...when we got home my sweet husband (sh) started to burn the leaves. My neighbor came down to get me to come look at breakfast nook that he's building me. All I can say is WOW! it looks so good. He's very talented. This is the same neighbor that cut me a wooden egg for my door. We've been slacking with the cleaning so I did the dishes while my sh did some laundry. Now it's time to relax and hang out with my sh. Oh and the dr office called and canceled my appt I'll be going Wednesday afternoon now. Next week is the dreaded week for anyone ttc..

Sundays

I love Sunday's! On usual we go to church, then grab lunch, then...ahh... relax and nap the rest of the day. That to me is a wonderful day. Well today was different. We went to church then came home and ate the yummy 3 hour shepherds pie from last night. Then went to a friends house. She just started selling mary Kay so I went and bought some stuff from her. We then rushed to meet our friends at the circus. It's our first one as a family and hmm we really weren't missing much. Let me just say the floors there were so sticky! I went down to get the kids glow stuff and on my way back up the stairs I literally walked out of my flip flops like 4x!!! I almost peed my pants! One of our friends kept saying the clowns are down there....they knew I was doing something crazy on the stairs, but weren't sure what. I really just was ready to park it and sit on the stairs. After the circus we went to my parents and had dinner. It was wonderful. It's been a long day! My sweet girls playing hookie tomorrow. I may make a presence at mops in the morning. Night :)

I crack myself up!

Today has been a long eventful day. I worked, then met my husband and parents at plant world. We picked out some nice plants. We chose Indian hawthornes for our bushes and a sweet olive tree. The periwinkles weren't ready yet so I'll go back and get a ton of those soon. My husband and one of his friends racked all the leaves in a pile and informed me they would be burning them...huh? I don't want a black ditch! Oh well I'm not gonna bag them all up so I'll just let him do whatever. Last night we had an event at church called "all things chocolate". It was pretty good. One of the songs that was sang made me happy.. Then I started day dreaming about how we would announce that I was pregnant. You know when the time comes. I've catch myself do that a lot. It's gonna be a pretty amazing day! My sweet girl had her own adventures today. She hung out with her daddy all day then went to a friends house. They went to chickfila then to take glamour shots. I can't wait to see them. She asked me Thursday on the way to school...when we get a baby sister or brother...then do I get to drive..umm What?!? She is so silly! I said let's call daddy and ask him. I always call him when something funny happens like this. I love including him on everything. So we all can laugh together even if it's over the speaker phone. Well let me now explain why I crack myself up. As I said on a previous post we did freezer cooking last week. (Or atleast I ment to write about it) well I pulled out a frozen sheppards pie and it said cook on 375 for 1 hour so I popped it in the oven. And hour later I pulled it out and it was still frozen in the middle...so LITERALLY 2 hours later meaning a total cooking time of 3 hours later we had the most tasty dinner. Yum! I had never had it and loved it! During those few hours I cooked 2 big pots of cheesy chicken spagetti. A friend of mine had a baby a week ago so I'm bringing her some Monday for dinner. At the same time I tried baking some blueberry muffins. I mean how simple! Wrong I burnt those puppies up! I am honestly getting use to these things happening. I always try cramming so much in such a short time. I'll learn one day:)

They have my heart

So today was a Long one...not in a bad way I just worked til 730 which is late for me. Ive just gotten so use to getting off around 3! So after I picked my girl up from school we went to the library. She had a dr Seuss snack in celebration for his bday this week. Then her daddy met me at work so I could do one of my friends hair. When I got home she informed me that her daddy took her to the park! Oh my that just made my day!! I love that he worked all day then took time out and brought her to the park. That makes my heart so happy. We have a very busy weekend. I'm kinda excited about my dr appt Monday...even though I'm sure I'll cry! Oh well :)

Monday

Ok so I have another dr appt Monday. They will have to do another pelvic exam for me to do another round of clomid. I've got some questions to ask like what are the next couple steps...just need to figure the money situation. I contacted the hospital that I had my hsg done at and I'm thinking it cost less than what I was quoted! Umm yes! Sounds good to me. Me and my little girl went for a play date this evening. She really loves babies. I think she will be a wonderful big sis. Even though I have to clarify that she's not gonna have a baby in her tummy... Mommy will. That kinda makes her nervous thinking SHE will have the baby. Ahh they are so funny.

Those cheap ovulation kits!

Ok so we didn't get to do the artificial insemination because I never got my lh surge... Or maybe I just had a cheap ovulation kit and I couldn't decide if it was positive or not. TRUST me next cycle I will have the kind that says Yes or No! Those faint lines are not for me...I start seeing stuff :)! Well this past week was a very busy week for me which is great. Works been busy thank goodness bc my mind starts spinning when I have too much free time. I've been cooking a lot this week (I'm such a beginner). Some of the life group girls did a freezer cooking exchange. I cooked vegetable beef soup which possibly won't feed everyone... I've never cooked for 8 families like that! I will do better next time. It's simply the best idea ever! We are having cheesy ckn spegetti for dinner and I'll I had to do was thaw and then warm. Love it! Well I finally finished my egg and hung it on my front door. My sweet girl just informed me "momma I'm hyper"... Oh boy! Oh yesterday we had our first life group baby shower. It was just perfect! Our group is really getting close and I'm loving it. This is just what my family needs, a group of people wanting the same things out of life. We have so much going on in the month of March...I'll be writing all about it.

Adoption

Ok so yes I've been really thinking about adoption. I know we havent been trying too too long, but a year and a half has been FOREVER in my world! My sweet husband likes the idea of it too. I personally think he's getting tired of nothing happening. He doesn't talk about it on his own like I do, but there has been times where we see a cute little boy and he'll say "man I can't wait". Ugh I can't either! I've NEVER been mistaken for a patient person...those that' know me well know that when my heart get a set on something it's SET! I promise I'm trying to be patient!! Because at the end of the day I honestly know it's all in Gods timing...but I just wish I knew how we would add to our family. And WHY the Dr can't figure out why I can't get pregnant. I mentioned adoption to my mom today and she doesn't think taking a loan out to adopt is very smart.. But I think hey the only debt we have is our house...so I'll just keep my car longer and get a baby instead of a new car??!?! Make since? It does to me. I mean it's not like we can just save what like $30,000 then adopt? I'm hoping that this I guess they are calling it an iui will work.... Oh my that will make this girl happy!!!! Back to adoption..it's such a scary thing! Birth parents have too much time (in my opinion) to change their minds. I personally think hey they just had 9 WHOLE ENTIRE MONTHS to think this through...and if they still want to give their baby to a loving family then it's probably what's really best. I don't think they should go home and pout and then get their baby back. This is a lot of rambling yes, but hey thats why I started this thing. For me and yes to possibly have someone else in this boat to stumble upon:)

This is me trying to cope

So here goes... I have been told by a dear friend that she thinks journaling or blogging will help me with everything that's going on in my life. So this is me trying to do so. 

I will give a brief run down of the past 4 years of my life.

I met the man of my dreams and we quickly got married. We were blessed with becoming pregnant without even trying. It was the most amazing thing that i've ever experienced! I knew from a young age I wanted to be a mom. Isn't it every girls dreams? Well our sweet girl is a very happy energetic 3 year old. We couldn't ask for a more perfect child...really!

We started TTC our second child in June of 2010 right before Alyssa turned 2. After 6 months of trying my doctor said your so young give it 6 more months and we will see what happens. Well we kept trying and NOTHING! I then revisited him and he wanted to check my progesterone levels. So we did and they looked good! Which means I am ovulating on my own. Which I pretty much knew I was, because i'm regular...except for a time or two that i was late and i just knew it was my time...but no just my body messing with me. So after they tested my levels i started taking clomid. I personally think that's when I became an emotional mess! Maybe because I then had to start tracking when I ovulate and everything else for that matter so YES my world became consumed with trying to read and learn my body. I wanted a month or so then did my second round of clomid. I think I handled things better that month. My husband may think different. 

Still NOTHING!! Ok so yes at this point I was getting really discouraged. I mean everyone and I do mean EVERYONE was getting pregnant or was pregnant or just had a baby. Everyone except me that is. So the next step was for my husband to get checked. He was so willing to do anything that was needed to figure this problem out. Well we got the wonderful results that his little swimmers are just perfect! I'm really relieved because I would rather it be me than him.

The next step was the HSG test. I priced checked the test and found the state hospital was the best cash price for this test. I was happy about that because one of my sweet clients just so happens to be an OB there...so when I could finally schedule my test I went in and found out everything looked good! I really didn't know if I was happy or sad. I kinda wanted an answer, a reason that I am still not pregnant. So now that my tubes look good my Dr wants me to do Artificial Insemination. Yikes...sounds crazy right? But I do trust him and will be doing it as soon as I get a positive on my ovulation sticks. Until then I'll keep you posted.